Imrpove not prove

Numbing Routine

At 23, something clicked for me—not as a sudden idea, but as a deep understanding. I became more aware of the world as it truly is. Nothing prepares you for the journey ahead or the outcome that awaits.

Cliche to say but every day felt like a repeat of the last. I’d stay up until 11 PM playing Fortnite with the boys, then watch YouTube until my eyes gave out. Suddenly—BEEP BEEP BEEP—my alarm blared like an emergency alert at 6:30 AM. My eyes, glued shut from the night’s built-up crust, peeled open reluctantly. A yawn, a stretch, and then the routine continued.

The shower became my one place of peace, a moment of stillness before the day’s chaos. The warm water felt like a cleanse, a reset. My mind wandered: What am I even doing with my life? What’s my end goal? But before I could dwell, 10 minutes had passed—I had to get out. Work awaited.

By the time I got there, my boss was already barking about a client complaint. I sighed, knowing I’d do what needed to be done because, at the end of the day, I liked making money. Hours later, I clocked out, drove home with Arctic Monkeys playing in the background, staring at the endless yellow lines on the road. A small part of me felt accomplished—I had been productive. But a much louder part of me felt… unfulfilled.

And tomorrow? I’d do it all over again.

The Trap of Routine & The Advice That Changed My Perspective

If you've worked a 9-to-5, you probably know this feeling all too well. I started working right after high school, intending to take a gap year because of COVID. At first, I actually enjoyed it. There was comfort in the structure, a predictable rhythm to life. My coworkers were great—most were older and had wisdom to share.One coworker, let’s call him Paul, left a lasting impact on me. One day, he looked at me with a knowing smile and said, “Kid, I don’t think this job is meant for you in the future. Don’t be afraid to take risks while you’re young—you can afford it.” He patted me on the back and walked away.

That should have been my moment—the push I needed to start something new, to chase a bigger vision. But instead, I convinced myself that I could make it work. I wanted to stay with the company because they had given me so much. I wanted the best of both worlds: a steady paycheck and the ability to build something for myself.

But I got stuck. The routine drained my energy, my creativity, my purpose. Paul had seen something in me before I even realized it myself. He had listened, observed, and understood me in a way I hadn’t yet understood myself. Looking back, I’m grateful. The world has a way of aligning when you truly listen—not just to advice, but to those who genuinely want you to be happy, not just successful.

The Locus of Control

Check out this video before reading. You will not regret it. 

Okay if you don’t want to watch the video. Basically, people with an internal locus of control believe that their actions, choices, and effort determine their outcomes. If they fail, they see it as a learning experience and make adjustments to improve. This mindset fuels motivation because they believe they have the power to shape their future. On the other hand, those with an external locus of control feel that outside forces—luck, fate, or other people—dictate their success. This can lead to a lack of motivation, as they may feel powerless to change their circumstances. While external factors do play a role in life, true growth comes from recognizing what we can control and taking responsibility for our actions. The key to lasting motivation? Shifting your mindset toward empowerment, embracing challenges, and believing in your ability to create change.

This is not just words of encouragement to expand your mind, there have been many experiments of locus of control. For example, Martin Seligman, who studied at Princeton, a renowned psychologist, mainly in positive thinking.

Seligman and his team conducted an experiment using dogs to study how perception of control affects behavior. They placed dogs in a cage with a floor that could deliver a mild electric shock. The dogs were divided into three groups:

Group 1: Dogs that could press a lever to stop the shock.
Group 2: Dogs that received the same shocks but had no control over stopping them.
Group 3: Dogs that received no shocks (control group).
Later, the researchers put all the dogs in a new cage where they could easily escape the shocks by jumping over a small barrier. The dogs from Group 1 quickly figured out how to escape, but the dogs from Group 2—who had previously learned they had no control—did not even try. Even when they had the ability to change their situation, they remained passive, showing signs of helplessness.

Young me had an external locus of control. I believed that I was the best at everything and anything. The confidence was there but it was the ego that often took over fate. Now, I believe accountability is better than blaming outside factors, even if it was the case- you can’t change the outcome but accept the consequences to better your understanding of ways to deal with hardships. 

My Hero

Lamar Jackson: The Ultimate Underdog Story

Lamar Jackson—aka "Action Jackson," "Elite 8," and "New Era"—isn’t just the face of the Baltimore Ravens; he’s the embodiment of resilience. I’ve followed him since high school when his highlight reel looked like something out of a video game. His journey wasn’t easy. Lamar grew up in Lantana, Florida, later moving to Boynton Beach—an area known for its hardships. At just eight years old, he suffered an unimaginable loss: both his father and grandmother passed away on the same day. Left in the care of his single mother alongside three siblings, football became his outlet, his escape, and ultimately, his future.

Despite his raw talent, many doubted him. The University of Louisville saw what others missed, giving him the chance to showcase his dual-threat abilities. He didn’t just rise to the occasion—he dominated, winning the Heisman Trophy, the highest honor in college football. Naturally, I expected him to be a top-five pick in the NFL Draft. But the so-called "experts" had other ideas.

Leading up to the draft, analysts like Bill Polian, Mel Kiper, Colin Cowherd, and even Stephen A. Smith questioned whether Lamar could succeed as an NFL quarterback. They labeled him a better fit at wide receiver or running back, dismissing his ability to lead a team at the highest level. What they failed to recognize was Lamar had this thing called "DAWG"  in him that can never be taught. He refused to switch positions, believing in himself when few did.

Fast forward to today—Lamar Jackson, a two-time unanimous MVP, an electrifying leader, and a record-breaker. Watch this post-game interview, especially after a loss, and you'll see his accountability. He never points fingers—he owns his mistakes, learns from them, and moves forward. That’s what separates him.

Lamar Jackson isn’t just a player. He’s proof that hard work beats doubt, belief outweighs criticism, and humility fuels greatness. His story isn’t just about football—it’s about having a vision, blocking out the noise, and letting your actions do the talking.

Connection to Locus of Control and Motivation

This experiment demonstrated the power of perceived control in shaping behavior. The dogs that learned they had no control stopped trying, similar to people with an external locus of control who believe their actions don’t matter. Meanwhile, the dogs that had experienced some control remained motivated to act. This supports the idea that fostering an internal locus of control—believing that you have power over your life—can significantly boost motivation and resilience.

For people, this means shifting your mindset to recognize that while some things are out of your control, your reactions, efforts, and mindset can change your outcomes. By taking responsibility for your life, you build the motivation needed to overcome challenges.

The Power of Excitement, Energy & Self-Empowerment

Love, excitement, and energy are the lifeblood of self-empowerment. The key isn’t to find motivation—it’s to find something that naturally excites you. When you do, motivation takes care of itself. Start by focusing on the things you can change, taking small steps toward your goals, and viewing obstacles as opportunities to grow. The more you take ownership of your actions, the more empowered and motivated you’ll feel. Your future isn’t just about luck or circumstance—it’s about the choices you make every day.

If you take anything from this, let it be this: your job can provide stability, but your passion is what will give you life. Don’t let routine numb your purpose. Seek excitement, embrace curiosity, and chase whatever sets your soul on fire.

Do not chase growth to silence doubt, nor rise just to be seen. Improve not to prove, but to bloom. That every step forward is a gift to yourself and not just a response to the world. True fulfillment comes not from proving others wrong but becoming someone you are proud to be. 

IMPROVE NOT PROVE!